“Did I come across badly?”
Your nerves can colour your memory. Separate what you felt from what the other person actually said or did.
See beyond the awkward feelingRisk Someone · The Book + Exercise BookNow on sale
Know yourself.
Find your people.
Tired of second-guessing yourself with people? Understand your patterns, say what you need and recognise a connection that works both ways.
The Book helps you understand it.
The Exercise Book helps you put it into practice.
Checking your place…
Find your starting point
Does this sound like you?
“Why am I always the one making plans?”
Effort can look different on each side. Notice what each person brings, then ask directly for the part you are missing.
Ask for more shared effort“Why does this keep happening to me?”
A familiar disappointment often has a familiar sequence. Find the point where you can respond differently.
Find the pattern you can changeFind your way into the book
What keeps getting in the way?
Overthinking conversations? Always reaching out first? Find something you can do differently next time.
Sixteen statements · About three minutes
Keep second-guessing yourself?
- Tell us what feels familiar.
- See what might be getting in the way.
- Get one thing to try, with chapters that explain why.
Free · No email needed
Better connections start with understandingLess guessing.
Less guessing.
More being yourself.
Dating, friendship, the people you let close. It gets easier to find your people when you understand what you need — and make room for who they are.
Notice what keeps repeating.
The Book helps you explore why you hold back, overthink or do all the reaching out.
Get curious. Stop guessing.
Learn to ask what someone means, hear a different point of view and notice whether the effort is mutual.
One small step, in real life.
Open an Exercise Book activity. Practise saying what you need, setting a boundary or starting a conversation.
Parts
What you can work on
Part One
The Approach
The Approach begins before anything much has happened, when we are deciding whether to enter the room, what to reveal and which familiar version of ourselves to bring with us.
Part Two
The Encounter
The Encounter looks at what happens once another person is actually there, with needs, habits and interpretations of their own.
Part Three
The Reckoning
The Reckoning asks what remains afterwards, what keeps repeating and what we might do differently next time.
The Exercise BookMake a small change.
Make a small change.
See what gets better.
Sixteen bite-sized topics bring together explanations, videos and exercises for everyday moments. Choose the one that feels useful today.
Write a few notes. Try one action. Save your place and return when you are ready.
Open the Exercise BookIncluded with your purchase · online exercises + printable PDF
A little more understanding. A different next step.
Choose how you want to begin.
Choose the Book, the Exercise Book, or both. Read online and keep the printable files in your library after payment.
The Book
Understand the patterns
For the moments you keep replaying. Read the Book at your own pace and make sense of what happens between people.
£5.99 one payment
- The complete Book
- Read online in your library
- Book PDF + EPUB
The Exercise Book
Put it into practice
Reflect on an everyday moment with bite-sized explanations, videos and exercises. Try one small change and see what it feels like.
£7.99 one payment
- 16 bite-sized topics online
- Progress saved as you go
- Printable Exercise Book PDF
Save £3.99 (29% off) compared with buying separately
Read it. Try it. Make it yours.
Get the Book and Exercise Book together: read online, reflect in your own time and keep the printable files close by.
£9.99 one payment
- The Book and Exercise Book
- Book PDF + EPUB and Exercise Book PDF
- One payment · no subscription
Want to get a feel for it first? Explore the Exercise Book
Fair questions
Before you get started.
What’s included, how to access it and where to begin.
Ask us anythingOne last thing
You can ask a better question
Start with the free introduction and first Exercise Book topic. Understand one familiar moment, then practise a different response.